24 July 2011

Blandness is a sin



One of the worst crimes that manufacturers can commit when making a car.


Nissan Sunny 1300 1986

IT’S easy for people to say on what cars are one of the fastest, the sexiest or the worst. The most boring car is another kettle of fish altogether. 

If you talk about crap cars. You can say how unreliable or how ugly they are. What silly features they had that were total gimmicks. Even if you have ripped your hair out over your car going wrong. Like at a time your crap car broke down in a cloud of smoke. You’ll probably look back and laugh about it. They didn’t have their dull moments. The flaws are part of what give the cars character. It’s what makes them interesting in my humble opinion.

Don't get me wrong, I like a reliable car as much as the next motorist. But I’m no ordinary motorist. A car to me (as with many car nuts and petrol heads) is more than an A to B tool. I like to have an emotional connection with a car on what it can do and/or how it makes me feel. That’s probably down to me being a bit of a sucker for cars that are beautiful, fun or interesting. Over ones that are boring and reliable. If any car I own is reliable, then that’s a bonus with hasssle free motoring thrown into the mix.

When speaking of boring cars, the Nissan Sunny and the Toyota Auris are good examples. Uninspiring as were most Japanese cars of old. Yes, there are a lot worse cars I can assure you. Competent cars they are, but they're so ridiculously BORING. Forget charisma or any distinctive features. They're just a mode of transportation, that’s all they are. Nothing more, nothing less is what I think the cars' ruthlessness is what makes them so soulless. 

Toyota Auris HSD
Zzzzzzzzzz.....Toyota leads the way in building boring cars.

Don’t get me wrong, they're not bad cars and far from it. The Sunny and Auris are rather like the geeky kids at school. Practical, reliable and comes into lessons with their bags, books and pencil cases. They would never turn up late and would panic over breaking a school rule. They would rather do theirs studies on a Saturday afternoon than play tig outside. They're not intimidating or scary, but they’d probably piss you off for being politically correct do-gooders. Even if they do nothing whatsoever to intentionally annoy you. You'd just want to kick them up the backsides.

It’s difficult for me to take cars like the Sunny and the Auris seriously. All the more reason with the irony over the Nissan’s nameplate. I mean, this is not a car to brighten up your day. It’s as exciting as the grey clouds in the sky hovering above you. It would be more appropriate for it to be called the Nissan Grey. Speaking of grey, they have the aesthetics of a grey cardigan.

But when it comes to cars being made with: no soul, no passion, no flair or no imagination. In short, a car being an only means of getting from place to another. Cars that are built and made for people who want an A to B tool that couldn't care less about cars. That’s all there is to ones like the Nissan Sunny and the Toyota Auris. Ditchwater dull that leaves a lot to be desired.

6 comments:

  1. Hear hear! Some cars really are boring,aren't they?Toyotas....reliable,yes,but they've got no character!

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  2. Yes Lisa, that pretty much sums up Toyotas (if you exclude the MR-2, Celica and Supra)

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  3. Toyota are one of the most boring manufacturers at the moment (excluding tiny ones like Ssangyong and Perodua, which are just awful!). They aren't producing any exciting cars at the moment. Similar manufacturers know how to make something fun, Nissan have the 370Z and GT-R, and Honda the Type R line.

    It's unfortunate that boring cars are still being made too. There's the new Nissan Micra which all the reviews have said are bland and even the Lexus CT which again is being criticised for lack of fun.

    More people need to buy something with a bit of character, and it's not just expensive cars that offer that!

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  4. Here i introduce to select whatever new/usedcarsforsale you select.

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  5. Hey thats a nissan cherry! I have One! 118k miles and still going strong never broken down - needed a fue patches here and there but still! The passion wagon lives on! ;)

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  6. I never said they were bad cars. Boring cars don't necessarily mean they're bad ones. Credit to you keeping an old Cherry on the road by the way ;)

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