20 May 2016

I’m a bit of a sucker for crap cars

One of those skeletons that's come out of Luke McCormack's garage.



WHILST I do like supercars. The breath taking looks, the soundtrack of powerful V8 and V12 engines and last but not least, they go like stink. They’re cars that many dream of owning, yet these only become a reality for the privileged few.

At the other end of the scale, there have been some truly awful cars that should never have graced tarmac. Somehow, I do find some of the worst cars ever made to be fascinating. Just as much as I do with some of the finest supercars.

Take the Austin Allegro for example. Yes, it’s a terrible car. One that often features in a book or a top ten list of being one of the worst cars EVER made. When it comes to retro and classic cars, I'm partial to those with period looks and features. An applejack green or a mustard yellow Allegro with a black vinyl roof would do me nicely. It’s just one of those skeletons hiding in my garage.

If I see someone driving behind the wheel of a well-preserved crap car like an Allegro. It can say more about the person than the other one in a Ferrari of a similar vintage. Let me explain here...

You see with the Ferrari, you'll have more of an idea about him (or her). It says a lot about his or her bank balance. But he or she does have great taste. Who would be more interested in trying the finest bottle of matured wine or champagne. Which would have been bought and packaged in a fancy handmade basket. He or she will probably own a villa, or a block of flats in Monte Carlo that they'll rent out.

But with the Allegro, there’s more than a fair share of mystery about him or her. What sort of person would own one today? But one thing’s for sure that he or she won’t give a monkeys what others think of them. They’re proud to be a bit out there, and daring to be different. An eccentric character that will more than likely to have a sense of humour.

Whilst I'm not brave enough, rich enough, and/or have enough mechanical knowledge to own a piece of Autoshite like an Austin Allegro. I do admire those who take the plunge in doing so. Who own and drive these dreadful cars and keep them going. But then again, some may tell you I've been there and done that with that ropey Ford Ka I used to own.

Whether or not they're classics, they keep them in tip top condition. Money is no object for some of them. They'll have more value as a sentimental product (usually for nostalgic reasons) than they ever will on the market. For these reasons alone, I applaud those that keep the shite on the road. They have my respect.

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